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Umbert is invited to a party with his friend Diane in a sumptuous Haussmann apartment in Paris.
Diane friends know the good manners and how to behave.
To present oneself is the first act of interaction with the other guests.
The first impression being the one that counts the most, Umbert reminds you of the basic rules of the New Etiquette and manners.
“Politeness is a mark of respect : nature gives it, education increases it », Louis-Philippe de Ségur, diplomat
“La politesse est une marque de respect : la nature la donne, l’éducation l’augmente”, Louis-Philippe de Ségur, diplomate
In this article :
1) General rules
2) The presentations rules
3) The presentation process
4) Kiss or no kiss
1) General rules to introduce yourself according to the New Etiquette
Immediately giving the best self-image is a difficult art, so Umbert offers you those general advices that are easy to follow anywhere.
- First you have to stand-up to meet the guests.
- Keep your arms loosely at your side, ready to shake hands.
- Smile to give the image of a person at ease, happy to know those that are presented to you.
- Do maintain eye contact to prove your sincerity and confidence, do not keep your sunglasses if you are outside.
- Speak clearly to avoid having the caller repeat, especially your name, so never chew gum, or eat while talking.
If you are shy or uncomfortable, have someone introduce you.
If you meet a celebrity, do not stare at her, and take a picture only with her permission, especially if she has a bodyguard !!
2) The presentations rules to introduce yourself according to the New Etiquette
- Three criteria must be respected : the age, the sex and the social status.
- The youngest person is presented to the oldest
- The man to the woman
- An employee to his employer
- The least “graded” to the most “graded”
- The persons to reach out first are :
- The women
- The hosts
- Older people
- People of high social standing
3) The presentation process to introduce yourself according to the New Etiquette
- State your name first, then your second name: “Good evening, Umbert De Paris ». Never say : the name first, or Mr Umbert De Paris, or I am Umbert De Paris. Only use Mr or Mrs when you make an appointment, for example, at the hairdresser.
- You can say « Mr », « Sir », « Mrs » or « Madam » only for an older person.
- How should the handshake be ? Be careful, it reveals your personality !
- Too strong : proof of self-confidence, but also of authoritarianism
- Not strong enough : proof of indifference, of boredom
- Too long : loving intention or strong affection
- Strong enough, not too long : this is the proper way to do it
- If you wear gloves, remove them, but a woman can keep them in the street. The man must propose to the woman to keep them.
- If you enter a room where there are many people : it is not necessary to shake hands, you must shake the host hand, and smile to all saying a general hello
- Once the interlocutor knows your name, you can add “How are you? ». Never starts with “How are you?” which is reserved for intimates.
- You can say “I am delighted to meet you” or” I am delighted to know you “or” I am very happy to meet you “. Never say “delighted” or “I am happy” or “very happy.”
- If you are introduced to a young boy or girl : “Hello” can be followed by the first name. This formula is warmer.
- If someone forget to introduce you, do not hesitate to introduce yourself by saying “Good evening, I think we have forgotten to introduce ourselves, my name is (First name and last name) ».
Diane introduces Umbert to her friends.
They first meet Emma in conversation with Charles. Diane says “Umbert, Iet me introduce you to Emma ».
“Emma, may I introduce you to Umbert ?”
Then they meet Charles : « Charles, this is Umbert ».
Umbert « How are you ? », shaking hands
4) Kiss or no kiss
- If you want to be introduced to a woman :
- Bow a little and introduce yourself
- Wait for the woman to give her hand
- Do not kiss the people you meet for the first time.
- Never force someone to kiss you.
- You can kiss if the person who is introduced to you bends over to kiss you
- You can kiss a very young child
- If a person blush while kissing him, act as if you have not noticed anything.
Umbert hopes that you’ve learned some tips to know How to introduce yourself according to the New Etiquette.
Depends on the country, greetings rituals may change, especially in Asia. Follow Umbert on his next adventures and weekends to learn about international New Etiquette advices.
What must be remembered : Always stay yourself, ready to meet and greet people. Role play with a friend to remember those rules which are very easy once known.
You can post a comment or ask Umbert about your next weekend in Paris, and new etiquette advices, in the section below.
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Bon voyage !
Umbert De Paris